Wednesday, November 19, 2008

The Actual DL on the D&C

So, a week later I am back in the office with the lovely doctor C and she runs in and hugs me (I love her - can I say that enough?) and I tell her this is shitty, and life can be shitty and she agrees with me. I know she isn't seeing first time pregnancies any more, but I ask her in a stage whisper if she will please, please, please make an exception for me (keep your fingers crossed - though she did give me a big smile).

So, Z is with me this time and he is in the waiting room flipping through some magazine I am supposed to be looking at for work. Let me just mention here that he has taken more time off work and is wearing a t-shirt that says "Zankou" on it. I love the fact that we look like chalk and cheese - me in my black dress, headband, black shades, all professional. He wears jeans and t-shirts like a little boy - and he still makes twice what I do. Anyway, Zankou is in the waiting room, the nurse always says: "Husband can stay in the waiting room, I have to steal you". I love the way she just says "husband", it tickles me.

Husband/Zankou is safely esconsed and I am whisked into the stirrups theater. I am so sick and tired of wearing bricks in my underwear, it is a relief to take it off and get on the funny little half-bed.

Doc C comes in and we chat and she takes a look inside in the theater of my uterus. She tells me there isn't any product but there is a thick lining (hence the bleeding and need for the bricks). She then proposed the D&C again. This time I say: "Yes". Just do it. Just get the damn thing done with and stop thinking about it. What is it? five minutes of pain in your whole life? Then she proposed Valium and I say: "bring it on".

Zankou is brought in. Poor him. Doc C asks if he wants to sit at the business end but he is like, no thanks, I'm fine up here with the face. I have to laugh. He is great though. A few winces and stares but generally good.

So, here is what happens with the D&C. First off the valium is put in intravenously. It feels a little bit weird, kind of cold or something. Then everything goes fluffy at the edges. The light fixture above my head was moving in waves so I thought, hmm nice, interesting. I watched that as the doc injected my cervix. I REFUSE to make a joke about a few small pricks here, but it was painful for a few seconds. It would be. It feels very uncomfortable and you want to back away. Which I did and Doc C made me scoot down again. You don't want to. 

Then the suction. It is a tube which is inserted inside for about a minute. I guess it depends on what is inside, but mine was pretty fast and not nearly as bad as I thought.  A little cramping and a little weirdness - mainly due, I think, to the valium.

I lay down for ten minutes afterwards and then went out, paid (next time Zankou, you pay) and we went to the car. I was suddenly hit with a brick wall of tiredness so, we get in the house, I crawl into PJs and goodnight for two hours.

So that is it. I woke up, I felt a ton better and actually, I think the bleeding has really abated. I had some cramping in the early evening but, fingers crossed, we are good.

Now its just a wait until we try again. Because try we shall! (I always wanted to end like a 1940s movie)

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